The Right Words to Say When Someone Has Experienced a Miscarriage

When someone shares that they have lost a pregnancy through a miscarriage, it can be difficult to know how to respond. Here are some thoughtful ways to approach the conversation, ensuring sensitivity, empathy, and support.

Acknowledge Their Loss

One of the most important things you can do is to acknowledge their loss. A simple, heartfelt message such as, ldquo;Irsquo;m so sorry to hear that. I canrsquo;t imagine how difficult this must be for you.rdquo; expressing your condolences and understanding of their pain can make a significant difference.

Offer Support

Let them know that you are there for them. You could say, ldquo;If you need someone to talk to, or if therersquo;s anything I can do to help, please let me know.rdquo; Offering practical support, such as meals, helping with errands, or simply being available to listen, can provide immense comfort during this challenging time.

Avoid Minimizing Their Experience

Steer clear of phrases that might minimize their experience, such as ldquo;Itrsquo;s for the bestrdquo; or ldquo;You can try again.rdquo; Instead, focus on their feelings and let them express themselves. Let them know that you are there to support them in whatever way they need.

Be Present

Sometimes, the most supportive thing you can do is simply be present. Just being there and listening can make a huge difference. Show that you are there for them, without judgment or expectations.

Follow Up

Check in on them later to show that you continue to care and are thinking of them. A follow-up message or a visit can help them feel supported during this difficult time. For example, you might say, ldquo;How are you holding up? I wanted to check in and see if therersquo;s anything I can do to help.rdquo;

Empathy in Lived Experience

From my own experiences and those of others, it has been observed that many people find comfort and understanding in expressions of sympathy. One woman sharing her experience mentioned, ldquo;Even with expressions of sympathy, it was reassuring to know that these spirits would have another chance for a body through Heavenly Fathers and Mothers ways.rdquo; While itrsquo;s important to respect any spiritual beliefs or values, a heartfelt ldquo;I am so sorryrdquo; can often convey genuine care.

If the person is not keen to talk, let them know that itrsquo;s okay. Simply saying, ldquo;Irsquo;m so sorryrdquo; is usually appropriate, unless the person has shared a lot of personal information. In such cases, a close friend might benefit from a more detailed response, such as, ldquo;This must be really difficult for you, but Irsquo;m here if you want to talk. Itrsquo;s okay to grieve, and Irsquo;ll do what I can to help.rdquo; Support them through actions, such as bringing meals or checking up on them as often as possible.

Conclusion

The key to supporting someone who has experienced a miscarriage is to be compassionate, respectful, and understanding. Your words and actions can make a significant difference during one of the most challenging times in a personrsquo;s life. By acknowledging their loss, offering support, and being present, you can help them feel seen and supported through their grief.